Reflection of pearls
As I reflect on the girl I used to be, I never would have expected the "auditions of life" I had run into. I recall being a young, vibrant dreamer with unstoppable energy, who felt on top of the world, believing nothing would stop me and no-thing was impossible. Little did I know, life's events would spin me on a journey that would test my faith through detours and roller coasters, which would lead towards a personal expedition in discovering the real me.
Compared to the process of a pearl, I felt like a small grain tossed inside the waves of a tumultuous sea, hiding in a shell between the different phases of life, awaiting to be unfastened. Shame, silence and self-sabatoge crept in as a result of trauma and mistaken identity. I chose to mask myself by numbing the pain, living in denial, and abandoning my personal power.
I had no idea that the seeds planted earlier in life would affect the way I viewed the world. I thought my perception was my reality, not understanding it was other people's projections that defined my reality. The traumas I experienced robbed me of a voice and instead, perfectionism spoke louder than my Savior. Performance then became my full-time employer as I began being everything to everyone and nothing to myself.
As I exposed the lies (fear) and embraced the truth (the Father's love), I was finally released from the prison of control. Not my past, people's critical judgments, or false interpretations of man's doctrines, could label my life or future, unless I permitted it. The pursuit of freedom merely costs faith to believe in the Father's goodness towards us. I had to retrain my mind that He had forgiven all my faults and baptized my anxieties with a good, expected end. It's in the promise of our birthright that gives us the power to exit the land of compromise and limitations. It takes brutal honesty, bravery, and a trust in letting go of pride and surrendering to the process of healing and deliverance.
As we've crossed over this Pass-Over and proclaim the victory of His resurrection, I encourage you to lay aside all heavy burdens and hidden insecurities at the shores of His Red Sea (He shed blood for you). The depths of Christ's love, went down to the grave and took away the sting of all shame, embarrassment, self-hatred, dis-ease, fear, rejection, the need for approval, and so much more. Feelings of bitterness became a bitter taste for Him on that cross so we can live a triumphant life here on earth.
Just like a pearl as it goes through its formation - even though no one sees the storms it overcomes - you too are destined to radiate with victory! We are His precious pearls; each one of us has been purchased at a costly price. There are people who wouldn't believe what you've been through unless you testifed about it. His passion is a witness to how far His Love will run for us. So spring into this brand-new month and allow the Father's love to rewrite your story.
"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto a merchant man, seeking goodly pearls: Who, when he had found one Pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had, and bought it." Matthew 13:45-46